Learning List

I wanted to post the following piece written by one of the IXF students at Sanskriti School. It struck me as a universal piece that applied to my experience and probably Sreelekha’s too. Radha Sarkar, high spirited and intelligent, impressed me with her willingness to open up to me and let me into her life. I went to her birthday party, her godmother’s birthday party, a dance recital and even shopping several times with Radha.
The thing I would add to the list is: Proximity makes friendships blossom and grow into more meaningful relationships.
I’ve been more melancholic than usual about missing India. I went to see the Hindi film “Guru” on Saturday night and found solace in being surrounded by Hindi speaking individuals. When I try to pin down what I miss most it ends up being the Sanskriti School community. They redefined what community means to me.
Enjoy Radha’s piece. I love the image of a “skyscraper of expectations.”


The Learning List
By Radha Sarkar
November 2006 Exchange trip to Gujurat, India

Most of the people on the trip to Dhrangadhra agreed that it was just one of those experiences that had to be “experienced.”
I’m almost grateful when people forget to ask me how the trip was-I’m not comfortable being at a loss for words. I’m unaccustomed, too. Thankfully, I’m not at a complete loss; I just shake my head in wonder when they ask, and that communicates a lot coming from an otherwise garrulous girl.
Writing of our trip to Dhrangadhra would be a lot more narrative-friendly if all we had to do was recite a timetable but it’s not that simple. I went to Dhrangadhra expecting…who knows what? Very little to put it mildly. What I came back with would confound even a skyscraper of expectations.
The people around me taught me things by showing them to me; and that is how the learning list came to be.

Learning Number 1: Preconceived notions are rubbish.
You get to a train station, scoff at your traveling companions. You get off at another train station, a week later, and there are twelve people crammed into the miniscule space between two carriages waving frantically to you, hanging out the open doors telling you to run with the train.
And these are the people you think you knew.

Learning Number 2: It takes seconds to make friends.
It could be a bike ride in the dark, being pedaled furiously forth by a person, half your weight or a national gold medalist, or a garba (Gujurati dance) night where it takes you an hour and a half to learn a step, and just when you think you can coordinate the clapping and the stepping, it’s time for everyone to go home.
People are the same, sugary food, money or not: No one is above or below an emotion. If it can make you cry, it can make them too. If it can make you roll on the floor with laughter, they can roll just as much.
And now I’m going to return to shaking my head in wonder. I’ll be doing this for awhile…well after you read this article….and maybe we can shake our heads together one day.

EXAMINE

In an email I wrote to Sree today, I said: Oh! and India is in me now. I just talk to people and never cut them or myself off. I just got in "trouble" for not returning to my exam block after my supposed 15 min. break. It cracks me up, but not most Americans.

Time is entirely different to people in India. But ultimately the value is what’s underneath. When someone stops to talk to me about my trip I feel it is only fair to say more than, “it was a great, life-changing, amazing experience.” But the GHS schedule (and American culture) doesn’t allow much time for interactions beyond quick snippets of sentiment. Talking to people and spending time with people is valued highly in India. Indians’ relationships are strengthened through the willingness people have to listen and hear what you have to say. Though that’s a generalization, it’s a fairly safe one considering my personal experience.

Now the clock ticks for midterm exams. For an hour and forty-five minutes students articulate in writing what they have learned. Then the teachers grade them. We are also grading the second quarter work and figuring out quarter grades. Yesterday it took me an hour to grade five exams. I have 49 upperclassmen exams and 54 freshmen. How long will it take Ms. Steinhorn to grade those exams? This mathematical word problem brings back the strain and intensity of teaching English. I do enjoy reading the exams and any student writing for that matter; it’s just tiring and time consuming. And it really matters what comments I write in the margins and at the end. I assume students learn from those marked up papers. I like to give each student the time he or she deserves for the time he or she invested in the paper.

Examining me and who I’ve become as a result of this exchange still bewilders me. I’m really the same person, but something somewhere has changed. I don’t think too much about it (not too much time :0) and it shouldn’t be overanalyzed. But it’s vital to me not to forget my time and connections in India. One thing I did was schedule an after school presentation. I hope to schedule a few more public speaking forums. Sharing my experience allows me to give back what I was given in India. What exactly that is can’t be defined but I bet people hear it in my voice and see it in my stature.

Music: “I’ve Got You Under My Skin” Frank Sinatra- My Way: The Best of Frank Sinatra

New Year's Day

When I was in high school and U2 became my favorite band for a few years, I remember playing "New Years Day" from Under a Blood Red Sky (1983) really loud that morning. How fitting it was to blast that song and shout the lyrics. "Nothing changes on New Years Day..."
But this year for me something will change.

The experience I had at Sanskriti School in New Delhi has stretched my awareness and confounded my points of reference. Creating relationships with students, colleagues and neighbors in those three months caused me to recognize the ability I have to adapt to new people and a new place. I know that I can go anywhere, meet the people and find commonalities among us. It makes me wonder if all people had this opportunity we wouldn't quickly stereotype and eliminate people from our social groups just because of their differences. To take it a step further...wouldn't this simple concept bring the world much closer to knowing peace?

Damini, a student from IXG, and I have been in touch already. She mentioned how she'll miss just seeing me around and knowing she can say hi to me during the day. It's true that just being there, the presence of a person can make one's life richer. The people I met enriched my character. And verified the simple sentiment that one of our American presidents said: people will long forget what one has said or done but will always remember how you made them feel.

Love- that's what makes the world go round, right? That's all we need. Love conquers all.
The multi-faceted face of love kisses me everyday. To be loved and to love provides me with a mountain range of happiness.

My cousin Joelle got married last night. She fell in love three years ago beginning on New Year's Eve. She wore the same blue shoes to her wedding that she wore when she met Denny. Their first dance, choreographed and rehearsed, was to a sweet love song from "Moulin Rouge." It was romantic. And I stood on my chair to see them fill the dance floor with their newly sealed love. What a fun way to spend New Year's Eve-with my husband, my family and in a room swelling with love. For them, their life will change.

So as U2 rings out "I want to be with you, be with you, night and day..." they didn't realize that the changes that happen on New Year's may not be drastic and sudden, but that love seeps into people's lives and propels them to new dimensions.

May love and peace find everyone today, this year and always.

Music: "Shower the people" James Taylor- Greatest Hits